Wrong address

Hundreds of protesters gathered at the wrong address to protest the building of the "Ground Zero Mosque".

Posted August 23 2010
Opinion, Politics, Satire
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New York, NY – Hun­dreds of pro­testers gath­ered Sunday at the wrong address in lower Man­hattan to protest the building of “The Ground Zero Mosque”. The pro­posed building is actu­ally a com­mu­nity center, and only about 15% of it will be used as a prayer space for Mus­lims. But it is this prayer space that has been wildly crit­i­cized by many extreme right wing media out­lets, including Fox News. Pro­testers gath­ered at the World Trade Center site, just out­side the Cort­land Street subway sta­tion, to voice their out­rage, unaware that the com­mu­nity center is actu­ally planned to replace an aban­doned Burlington Coat Fac­tory store on Park Place, 3 or 4 blocks north.

Many passers-by were quite con­fused by the protest, and sev­eral spec­ta­tors tried tell mem­bers of the crowd that the “mosque” was actu­ally going to be a few blocks away. The angry crowd did not take well to being told they were wrong, accusing the spec­ta­tors of being the agents of an Evil Empire trying to trick them into moving their protest away from sacred ground. “We’ve got a right to protest wher­ever we want, and you can’t stop us!” cried a man iden­ti­fied only as Al from Cincinnati.

“I was only trying to point them to the right loca­tion”, remarked Steven Driscoll, a res­i­dent of the Tribeca neigh­bor­hood. “But hey, if they want to protest here, that’s cool too. That end of Park Place isn’t really very attractive.”

The man behind the pro­posed com­mu­nity center, Imam Feisal Abdul Rauf, has been rel­a­tively silent throughout the con­tro­versy. Asked about his silence, he replied that he had no idea who was trying to build a mosque at Ground Zero, but isn’t him. The Imam added “I believe there is already a devel­op­ment plan for Ground Zero, and it doesn’t include a mosque. So I’m not sure what everyone’s com­plaining about.”

A group of people sup­porting the con­struc­tion of the com­mu­nity center, and reli­gious tol­er­ance in gen­eral, were allowed to hold a demon­stra­tion a couple of blocks away at another erro­neous location.